


Kissing In The Boys' Bathroom Until We're Both Dying Of Laughter

by professionalmomfriend (mothmanwashere)



Series: HogwartsStuck [8]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Bathroom makeouts, Hogwarts, Hufflepuff, M/M, dorky boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-17
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2018-05-02 02:12:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5229926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mothmanwashere/pseuds/professionalmomfriend
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All my titles sound vaguely like Fall Out Boy songs</p><p>But it's more like a troll movie title</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kissing In The Boys' Bathroom Until We're Both Dying Of Laughter

Karkat’s lowkey freaking out.

It’s been hours since he saw Dave at the train station, and at this point, he’s built up so much anxiety over talking to him that he’s doing anything he can to postpone that little occasion.

The train ride was easy.  He just slipped past the car Dave and John were in while Vriska soaked up all the attention, and headed for the back with the rest of the Head Boys and Girls.  He’d been preoccupied, but he’d been there, as Professor Snowman briefly lectured them on the expectations they would need to meet this term.  He’d sat by Eridan, because as insufferable a prick as he was, he was the best bet Karkat had among the gathered group.  Well, besides Rufioh, maybe, but the last time Karkat had spoken to Rufioh, he’d been overcome with the vague feeling that he was being hit on, but he couldn’t tell for sure.  At least when Eridan hit on him, he could tell.

Disembarking the train, he’d squeezed himself into a departing carriage full of Gryffindors.  They were loud and obnoxious, but Dave hadn’t seen him, so he was content to put up with the third-years until they reached the castle.  Then he’d booked it down to the Hufflepuff wing to grab his tie and get to the headmaster’s quarters before Dave happened across him.  He hadn’t planned on running into Tavros, but it wasn’t all that big a deal.  After retrieving his tie, he’d taken a shortcut up to the headmaster’s office and met up with Jane.  Headmaster Hussie had heard them outside and invited them in for a biscuit as they waited for the others.  The headmaster was pretty chill, Karkat thought.  Though he was kind of weird.  A lot of wizards were kind of weird, though.  It wasn’t a defining trait.

Now seated at the Feast beside Kanaya, Karkat can feel Dave watching him from down the table.  He had successfully ignored it through the Sorting Ceremony, but now, with everyone eating and talking, it’s harder not to glance his way.  His knee jiggles uncomfortably.  Kanaya senses his unease and asks what’s wrong.  “I gotta pee,” Karkat mutters, sliding out of his seat and rushing toward the doors.

Karkat knows he won’t be able to put it off forever.  They literally share a bedroom.  Dave’s going to track him down sooner or later, but Karkat’s just hoping for later.  So he goes to the bathroom and washes his hands for an unusually long time.  When he turns to use a towel, he starts violently at the sight of Dave leaning casually against the wall.  “Jesus fuck, Dave.”

“Didn’t mean to scare you,” Dave says.  He uses his wand to levitate a towel toward Karkat in offering. 

Karkat takes it, slowly patting his hands dry and trying to think of something to say that isn’t completely fucking stupid and incoherent.

“I’ve been nervous too, you know.”

Karkat’s gaze snaps up toward Dave.  “What?”

“I’ve been nervous all day,” Dave says, shoving his hands in the pockets of his trousers.  “I mean, like… nervous excited.  For the most part.  But it’s been all summer and, like… you know.  That little voice in the back of my head keeps telling me it’s different somehow.  That I’m gonna manage to fuck this up royally.  That kind of shit.”

“I keep telling myself it’s no different than any other year,” Karkat admits, setting the towel down and leaning back against the sink.  “We always pick right up where we left off.  But now that we’re like…”

“Yeah,” Dave agrees.  “Plus I don’t even know the first thing about how to tell anyone.  Especially John.”

Karkat nods.  “We’re kind of really bad at this.”

Dave laughs.  “Yeah, kinda.  But hey, school is for learning new things, right?”

Karkat tips his head and has to agree.  “It’s not like we have to tell anyone right away.  We can take it one at a time.”

Dave nods in agreement.  Karkat can’t decide what to say next.

“So,” Dave says after a few seconds of silence.

“So,” Karkat echoes.

Dave rolls his eyes and taps his head backwards against the wall.  “Jesus.  C’mere.”

With that, he shoves himself off the wall and grabs Karkat’s face, planting one on him right there in the middle of the boys bathroom.  It wasn’t quite what Karkat expected, but it isn’t like he’s complaining about it.  Somewhere in the middle of it, one of them starts laughing, and within moments they’re both giggling like idiots and have to stop kissing.

“God, we are so lame,” Karkat says, pulling Dave into a hug instead.  A nubby horn knocks against Dave’s jaw, but Dave pays no mind and squeezes Karkat tightly.  Karkat notes that he smells vaguely like apples and chocolate.

“Missed you this summer,” Dave says against Karkat’s hair.  “Like even with writing you every fucking day.”

“Me too,” Karkat agrees, before tugging back to he can see Dave.  “Sorry about Li’l Cal’s nicked tail feathers.  You know Jack.”

Dave shrugs.  “Dirk just kind of assumed he got caught in another fence.  It wasn’t like he was paying all that much attention.  We were in France, and Dirk spent the whole time building a sparring bot.  I spent most of the summer hanging out with Roxy, actually.  Which was cool.”

“Jack let me help write his potions curriculum for his first year class.  He never lets me anywhere near his lessons, usually.  But I guess he’s chiller since it’s my last year.”

“Dude, you didn’t score all the answers for _our_ potions class?”

Karkat smirks.  “I never said that.”

Dave slips his hands around Karkat’s hips, pulling him close and painting an innocent expression across his face.  “Karkat, babe, honeybunny, baby doll, hook a brother up.”

Karkat rolls his eyes.  “Yeah, yeah, yeah.  I got you, Dave.”

“So are we gonna keep chilling in the bathroom, or are we gonna go eat?”

“You’re the one who followed me.”

“You’re the one who didn’t come see me back at King’s Cross.”

“You were with John.”

“Who the fuck cares, dude?  You’re the one I spent all summer dying to see.”

Karkat can’t hide the smile that crosses his face.  “You’re so fucking sappy, god.”

Dave hooks his arm around Karkat’s shoulders and leads him out of the bathroom.  “I learned from you, dogg.  Too many stupid-ass romcoms, dude.  My irony levels are fatally low.”

“Shut the fuck up, Dave,” Karkat says as he shoves Dave away, but he’s grinning anyway.

They rejoin the Hufflepuff table together and Kanaya greets Dave casually as they take seats beside her.  “Everything alright?”

Karkat and Dave exchange a look.

“Fuckin’ golden,” Dave assures her, before picking up his butterbeer and taking a deep swig.

**Author's Note:**

> Professor Noir (Jack) is Karkat's guardian, if that wasn't clear. He hasn't got a troll guardian like everyone else bcs he's a mutant. Backstory on that will probably seep out eventually.
> 
> hogwarts-stuck-au.tumblr.com for anything related to this au


End file.
